Today is a bandh here in Kolkata and is also the first time I have ever ventured to office on a bandh. Empty roads are unheard of during normal week days so it was a treat to have reduced levels of pollution. Got a bus without much waiting and it was not too crowded. As expected, it moved a bit faster than a rickshaw, trying to pick up the few people who had braved the roads.
The bus went without any major problems to its final destination, apart from a diversion by the cops at a major intersection in the city. The experience was very interesting as my office is in a majorly crowded area in the city, however today it seemed as if it was nightime while the sun was shining. The attendance at work was very sparce, the surprising thing was that more percentage of female staff turned up as compared to the percentage of male staff. One wonders whether this reflects on the levels of dedication of the female staff we have here or whether the male staff are more bhitu (scaredy-cat like nature) than the female staff.
Since there was hardly anybody else at work, I spent the day browsing the net, checking my various email accounts and news feeds and composing this particular blog-post in my head.
On the way back, I got into a mini-bus which was pretty empty and was lucky enough to get a seat almost straight away. After a while the bus started getting crowded. I was sitting in the front and noticed a young-ish above average looking girl straining against the crowd trying to get into a place which didnt have as much of male lateral body pressure than the others. As luck would have it, she stood right in front of me. I think of myself as a rather chivalrous guy (if I may say so), so I got up and offered her my seat even though I didnt need to (since this is a mini-bus, there are no designated male/female seats). No big deal to me, but I was a bit surprised that the girl didn't even acknowledge my gesture in any way. I guess that maybe I shouldnt have expected anything in return since my gesture was meant to be selfless in nature. But, I guess that I am human and I was pondering on what happened to manners in this day and age? I mean...just a simple thank you or any gesture of acknowledgement would have made me feel better.
Maybe I should have been like all the other blokes sitting in other nearby seats (even the person sitting next to me was a male) and ignored her evident discomfort? Maybe I should have just sat there for the rest of my journey and ogled her breasts like everybody else around me was doing.
Or maybe I really am an anachronism in todays day and age...an idiosyncratic man as somebody once called me ages ago.
High time I learnt to be selfish, hardly anybody in today's day bothers to be selfless, being selfless and a martyr has not got me anywhere. In fact it has caused me more trouble than it is worth.
What the heck...lets see whether I am able to change this aspect of my personality as well as the others I am trying hard to change
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
What is the meaning of life?
I am not the first person to ask this question and I wont be the last.
According to Wikipedia...the meaning of life is an elusive concept that has been the subject of much philosophical, scientific and theological speculation.
One can go to Wilipedia and read the rest of the entry...it makes for interesting reading.
Over the last five years, I've spent a lot of time wondering about the same. Is there a reason to the existence that we eke out on this mortal plane? Is there an afterlife? Is there a higher power? And so on and so forth.
After a lot of contemplation, I ended up at exactly the same place where I started...with more questions than answers.
Sometimes I wonder at the tides of time rushing by all the denizens of this earth. Each and every act that we do, why do we do it? For what purpose?
Is there a way to truly find happiness? We took birth, took stumbling steps over our young years, which definitely are the best years of our life. Teenage years are mostly full of angst towards traditional modes of thought. Lo and behold, before we know it, we have finished half of our life and what have we achieved? The knowledge of one's mortality?
What is true happiness in the 21st century? Is it having a 8 digit bank balance? But as soon as we reach eight digits, we want nine...then ten and so on it goes.
Is true happiness having two square meals a day and a few metres of cloth around us to protect us from the elements and from prurient gazes?
Is true happiness getting a high paying job in a multinational corporation?
Or...is true happiness being content with oneself no matter what the situation is?
All of which boils down to what I asked in the title of this post.
My conclusion...there is no true meaning of life. Life is what you make of it. Everything you have done from the moment you were born brought you here today. Just make the most of what you do from now on.
According to Wikipedia...the meaning of life is an elusive concept that has been the subject of much philosophical, scientific and theological speculation.
One can go to Wilipedia and read the rest of the entry...it makes for interesting reading.
Over the last five years, I've spent a lot of time wondering about the same. Is there a reason to the existence that we eke out on this mortal plane? Is there an afterlife? Is there a higher power? And so on and so forth.
After a lot of contemplation, I ended up at exactly the same place where I started...with more questions than answers.
Sometimes I wonder at the tides of time rushing by all the denizens of this earth. Each and every act that we do, why do we do it? For what purpose?
Is there a way to truly find happiness? We took birth, took stumbling steps over our young years, which definitely are the best years of our life. Teenage years are mostly full of angst towards traditional modes of thought. Lo and behold, before we know it, we have finished half of our life and what have we achieved? The knowledge of one's mortality?
What is true happiness in the 21st century? Is it having a 8 digit bank balance? But as soon as we reach eight digits, we want nine...then ten and so on it goes.
Is true happiness having two square meals a day and a few metres of cloth around us to protect us from the elements and from prurient gazes?
Is true happiness getting a high paying job in a multinational corporation?
Or...is true happiness being content with oneself no matter what the situation is?
All of which boils down to what I asked in the title of this post.
My conclusion...there is no true meaning of life. Life is what you make of it. Everything you have done from the moment you were born brought you here today. Just make the most of what you do from now on.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Don't Quit
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up, though the pace seems slow -
You might succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup.
And he learned too late, when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt -
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.
When the road you're trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up, though the pace seems slow -
You might succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup.
And he learned too late, when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt -
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
About yours truly
Average looking guy, dark complexion, black hair with streaks of grey, 6 ft tall, medium build, intense eyes which look into your soul.
You want more?
Mid thirties, currently single, heavy smoker, occasional drinker, wannabe entrepreneur, willbe writer, IT professional trying out a new vocation at a non-IT company in Kolkata, WB, India.
Still more?
Been through a lot of tough times in my life, am in the middle of my toughest time after a massive personal disaster a few years back. Suffered a huge loss...loss of my self-confidence, self-esteem, lost my reputation, lost my ability to trust people, lost my faith in human nature, lost my friends/relatives, lost my job, lost a hellova lot of money. Basically everything I had slogged my ass off for 30-odd years to build with my own sweat and hard work.
Realized that in times of need, you get to know who are genuine people and who are fair weather friends.
I had a lot of resentment against the said fair weather friends for not being there when I needed them, even though I used to go out of my way to be there for them at the slightest hint of their needing me. But I realized that the resentment was holding me back from recovering and took a deliberate decision to climb out of the hole I had fallen in. I also realized that one is born alone and dies alone, everybody else in life are just co-passengers in the train of life.
So...I forgive you all who hurt me deliberately as well as unintentionally. You all meant a lot to me back in my yesteryears. However, now you don't and I cut myself from all strings of attachment with you.
But I make this promise to myself...I have struggled in the past and tasted the fruits of my labor even though during my struggles, I didn't see any light in the end of the tunnel. This is the biggest test of my life and a lot of times in the last few years I felt like it was all over. But now I realize that giving up would be the easiest thing to do. But I will not give up, I owe myself and my family that much.
Let life throw whatever else it can at me, I now have the belief that I can handle it.
I Will Not Give Up
I Will Not Quit
You want more?
Mid thirties, currently single, heavy smoker, occasional drinker, wannabe entrepreneur, willbe writer, IT professional trying out a new vocation at a non-IT company in Kolkata, WB, India.
Still more?
Been through a lot of tough times in my life, am in the middle of my toughest time after a massive personal disaster a few years back. Suffered a huge loss...loss of my self-confidence, self-esteem, lost my reputation, lost my ability to trust people, lost my faith in human nature, lost my friends/relatives, lost my job, lost a hellova lot of money. Basically everything I had slogged my ass off for 30-odd years to build with my own sweat and hard work.
Realized that in times of need, you get to know who are genuine people and who are fair weather friends.
I had a lot of resentment against the said fair weather friends for not being there when I needed them, even though I used to go out of my way to be there for them at the slightest hint of their needing me. But I realized that the resentment was holding me back from recovering and took a deliberate decision to climb out of the hole I had fallen in. I also realized that one is born alone and dies alone, everybody else in life are just co-passengers in the train of life.
So...I forgive you all who hurt me deliberately as well as unintentionally. You all meant a lot to me back in my yesteryears. However, now you don't and I cut myself from all strings of attachment with you.
But I make this promise to myself...I have struggled in the past and tasted the fruits of my labor even though during my struggles, I didn't see any light in the end of the tunnel. This is the biggest test of my life and a lot of times in the last few years I felt like it was all over. But now I realize that giving up would be the easiest thing to do. But I will not give up, I owe myself and my family that much.
Let life throw whatever else it can at me, I now have the belief that I can handle it.
I Will Not Give Up
I Will Not Quit
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